Inviting change into your life: finding & Holding onto your “why”
Change isn’t easy. We’re constantly told, “Find your why.” But what does that really mean?
Most people think of their “why” as a goal, a mission, or something external they’re striving for. But I’ve learned that your why isn’t a thing - it’s a feeling.
It’s the feeling of love, peace, contentment, joy…even righteous anger. It’s the emotional catalyst that propels you forward, the fire inside you that drives you to keep on going, when you feel like you can’t anymore. It fuels your transformation.
The challenge? We often lose touch with that feeling.
So, how do you identify your why, hold onto it, and let it guide you through change?
Your Why Is an Emotion, Not Just a Goal
Think back to a moment when you felt completely alive, aligned, and at peace. Maybe it was:
Falling deeply in love - that electrifying, soul-anchoring moment.
A personal victory - overcoming something you never thought you could.
A profound sense of purpose - when you knew you were exactly where you were meant to be.
For me, Celeste is my why. She is my catalyst for growth, my reminder of love, strength, passion, and deep connection. Not everyone meets their soulmate, but everyone has felt a moment of complete alignment with something greater than themselves.
Maybe for you, it was a feeling of peace after a hard season. Maybe it was the fire of righteous anger that drove you to take action.
That is your why!
It’s not about achieving something external - it’s about learning to hold onto that feeling and use it as a guide through life’s challenges and uncertainties.
Holding Onto Your Why (Even When Life Feels Heavy)
The problem with emotions is that they fade. They come and go, and are very unreliable. You don’t always wake up feeling deeply in love, passionate, or powerful. But that doesn’t mean your why has disappeared.
Here’s how you can hold onto that feeling:
Revisit Your Most Powerful Emotional Moments
Close your eyes. Go back to a time when you felt that deep, undeniable truth. Relive it. What did it feel like in your body? What did the air smell like? What were you thinking?
Your mind will try to tell you, “That was then, this is now.” But your body knows the truth. That feeling is still inside you.
Ask Yourself: How Can I Carry This Feeling With Me?
If love is your why, how can you show up with love today?
If peace is your why, what choices bring you peace?
If righteous anger is your why, how can you turn it into action?
You don’t need to chase your why - you need to embody it.
Creating Space for Your Emotions (Without Letting Them Overwhelm You)
Change is uncomfortable because it forces us to confront emotions we’d rather avoid. But every emotion is a teacher - even the difficult ones.
Here’s what I’ve learned:
You can’t suppress emotions without masking and also numbing joy.
You can’t grow without discomfort.
You can’t move forward if you refuse to process what’s holding you back.
When I struggle with overwhelming emotions, I go inward.
I close my eyes and see my younger self - the little girl inside me. I sit with her, hold her, and remind her that she is safe. I didn’t leave her behind. I talk to my emotions like they are living beings:
“I see you. I hear you. You are valid. Can I hold you?”
Every time, the emotion softens. The weight lifts. Love floods in.
Most people don’t allow themselves to fully feel their emotions because they fear being consumed by them. But the only way to release pain is to first acknowledge it.
Grounding Yourself in Change (Instead of Being Swept Away by It)
When life feels chaotic, emotions run high. If you don’t know how to ground yourself, you’ll get lost in the storm.
There are lots of ways to ground yourself. I’ve learned how to absorb energy, process it, and transform it into calm.
I’ve done this with friends, bringing balance to intense emotional moments.
I’ve done this with my youngest daughter, helping her feel safe enough to open up.
I’ve done this in relationships, learning how to hold space for others without losing myself.
When we master our emotions, we become a safe place - not just for ourselves, but for others. That is true power.
Your Why Is the Key to Lasting Change
Lasting change isn’t about willpower. It’s about connection.
Reconnect to the feeling that drives you.
Sit with your emotions instead of suppressing them.
Ground yourself so you can show up fully for yourself and others.
This is the work. And it’s worth it!
So, I ask you: What is your why?
Want to Go Deeper?
This blog is just the beginning. If you’re ready to:
Learn practical tools for holding space for emotions.
Work through personal blocks to lasting change.
Develop daily practices to stay grounded.
Then join my EXCLUSIVE membership, a space designed to support your healing and growth. Inside, I’ll be sharing:
Guided meditations & visualizations to process emotions.
Journaling prompts & workbooks for deep self-discovery.
Live Q & A sessions to ask me anything.
Coming Soon: Enrollment opens soon, so keep an eye here for updates, or sign up for my newsletter to be the first to know when it launches. Let’s not just talk about change, let’s live it, together!